A Baker's Dozen of Hostess Vintage Ads

The last Hostess cakes are being plundered and stockpiled off the shelves. The iconic American wholesale bakers have baked their last batch of cakes and breads. Their products included Twinkies, Ding Dongs, Sno-balls, Drakes Cakes, Choco-Diles, Nature's Pride, Dolly Madison, Butternut Breads and Wonder Bread.

Time to look back at some of the brand's advertising over its 90-plus year history.

The company first opened its business and gained a national audience from its base of operations in Kansas City, Missouri in 1919. Here's a few examples of Hostess Cakes print ads from the late 1920's.

Hostess Cakes, "Devil's Food Bar", 1929.

Hostess Cakes, "Devil's Food Loaf", 1930.

Hostess Cakes, "Zesty Lemon Loaf", 1929.

Hostess, "Creamed Filled Cup Cakes", 1956.

By the 1950's, Hostess had established its line of Cup Cakes as well as their popular Twinkies and Sno-balls.

Hostess Sno-Balls, "Glamour Gal", 1950's.

Some attempts to dress up their Sno-balls as sexy and "well-stacked" typified the sexism of the time. This ad is targeting retail stores in a business-to-business communication.

Hostess, "Ding Dongs", 1967.

1967 - the introduction of Hostess Ding Dongs.

Wonder Bread, "Date Bait", 1968.

Wonder Bread, "Boy Trap", late 1960's.

By the late 1960's, Hostess' Wonder Bread brand was also making a pitch to position itself as a way for girls to attract boys.

Hostess Mascots (from Left to Right)
Capatain Cupcake, Twinkie the Kid, Happy Ho-Ho, Fruit Pie the Magician
Not pictured: Chauncey Choco-dile

The 1970's saw the brand establish mascots for each of its popular lines.

Happy Ho Ho for Hostess Ho Ho's, "Devil's Food", 1970.

Twinkie the Kid, TV Commercial, 1980's

Twinkie the Kid first appeared in 1971. With a 10-gallon hat, kerchief and cowboy boots, he has saved the day ever since. He had a legendary sweet disposition and legacy as a wrangler of wrongdoing, having lassoed the hearts of millions. When it comes to true legends, Twinkie the Kid takes the cake.

ITT, "Twinkies", 1985.

Hostess went through several company holdership changes before its ultimate demise. For the majority of its life, the holding company was known as Interstate Bakeries. This name was changed to Interstate Brands with more expansions and acquisitions. This was taken over by IT company DPF in the mid-1970's, looking to diversify. By the 1980's, corporate restructuring saw ITT, the technology branch of DPF, separate itself from the Interstate Bakeries division. This ad explains why that split was made.

Hostess Cup Cakes, "90 Years"
Ad Agency: Bernstein-Rein, October, 2009.

The 1990's saw the baking conglomerate continue to expand, but over the last decade, management had run up significant debt and after several bankruptcy filings, the company has finally gone under recently.

Pour a glass of milk for the dessert foods that are no more.

PETA smacks a bitch up for veganism!

First, here's the TV ad that everyone's getting beat up about.




The commercial is another floor-buster in poor taste for militant ethical rights group, PETA (or People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals).

I didn't catch this on TV and I'm not sure what media buy PETA has for this, but it may go viral for all the wrong reasons. When I clicked on a link to PETA's YouTube channel and watched this PSA parody for the first time, the PETA name immediately raised my BS meter - and with good reason.

The voice over is narrated by former SNL comedian, Kevin Nealon, and reads:

"This is Jessica.
She suffers from B.W.V.A.K.T-BOOM...  

'Boyfriend Went Vegan And Knocked The Bottom Out Of Me.'

A painful condition that occurs when boyfriends go vegan and can suddenly bring it like a tantric porn star.

For Jessica, it's too late.

(Boyfriend) 'Oh you're back... you feeling better?'

Please go to bwvaktboom.com and learn to go vegan... safely."

In this ad, titled "Boyfriend Went Vegan", the scantily clad girlfriend in a jacket, Jessica, is all battered and bruised complete with a fake neck brace. The premise is that she is in this state from repeated roughhousing and non-stop sex as a result of suffering from a fictitious condition - "B.W.V.A.K.T.-BOOM" or Boyfriend Went Vegan And Knocked The Bottom Out Of Me.

But I really think it's PETA that have "knocked the bottom" out of taste and decency for their cause. In a lame attempt at controversy and humor, the boyfriend is the cause of all this mayhem. "Jessica" gives off a faint smile at the end, as if to say it's all worth it.

And viewers are then urged to visit the website URL to find out more information on going vegan. And here there's such pearls of wisdom to protect a woman from this syndrome, including tips such as: 

* Wearing a helmet (“strap it down, hop in bed and hold on tight”).
* Wearing goggles to “protect your corneas from his turbocharged loads”.
* Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles so you can handle his ‘superpower’.


At the end of my initial viewing, I have to say I was a little puzzled. I had never heard that going vegan turns you into a horny sex fiend (or violent misogynist) who can then manipulate your partners (or victims) into going out to grab some more fruit and veggies and then coming back for more.

And so the whole set-up becomes a stretch... a WALLOPING stretch - which isn't unusual for PETA, who continually manage to drop the bar of ethical standards for the sake of headlines. PETA have already come out to defend the ad stating that its "tongue-in-cheek", "humorous" (by whose standards?) and because the girl gives a "mischievous" smile at the end, she must like it. And so this must mean that its OK (especially if its in this fictitious far-fetched hypothetical scenario).

I believe I've heard rapists use a similar line of defence.

The ad agency responsible for this battered piece of waffle, Matter (who don't appear to have any online presence), most likely managed to convince PETA's marketing department that the controversy and headlines this will generate will outweigh the criticism. The convoluted sell will do little to persuade people to try veganism. Some will say that its generated a lot of word-of-mouth and "buzz". Sure. Maybe a few gullible people might take on the belief that not eating chicken and eggs gives your hormones a boost. Are there any scientific studies backing this up?

This is where the whole thing becomes offensive. PETA would rather have guys munching celery sticks and granola than steaks or cheese so that they can then slap girls around in the bedroom. To them, that is a forgivable trade-off.

This has nothing to do with veganism or vegetarianism but everything to do with PETA's shitty name as an "altruistic" organization which I feel has shamelessly peddled violence against women in a humorless vignette. The fact that PETA's President is a woman makes the irony all the more hard-hitting.

The impression many people get is that PETA will defend the rights of animals at the expense of the rights of women.

The impression I get (and have for quite some time now) is that PETA is a PITA.